The last few weeks have been interesting. We have been having a Life In The Spirit seminar at church during lent, and it is still going on. I am part of the team putting it on. This is a joyful thing for me, mostly. This last Monday, the Monday after Easter was our fifth meeting. At this meeting, we were supposed to pray over anyone that wanted for a greater release of the Holy Spirit in their lives.
When I got there, it was explained that we would be praying over people while sitting in chairs. I prefer to have people prayed over standing up. So, I was a bit bummed but willing to go along with the group leaders. You see, I had my vision of how things were supposed to go but I still was not 'happy' about it. Then, as we were sitting there at the start of the meeting, I realized I was putting limitations on God. In my mind, He would not be able to work miracles unless we did it my way. Pretty arrogant, right? Yeah, I thought so too.
Needless to say, it was a wonderful night for most people,and I know many hearts were changed and people were healed. I still had a letdown experience. I got done and just didn't feel good. In my mind, I had been just a noisy gong. My prayer partner did wonderfully, and I have confidence in God's power but I did not live up to my expectations. Do you ever have that feeling? Sometimes, I think my expectations are much higher than God's or at least the expectations are different.
Thankfully, I did not wallow in this feeling. On Wednesday, we had adoration time in front of the blessed sacrament. I felt very close to the Lord, and he gave me consolation. Then on Friday, I had a meeting with my spiritual director and shared much of this with him. Having this spiritual mentor is just fabulous for keeping oneself grounded.
Remember, that while the destination is important, equally so is the journey.
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