I'm Restless

I overheard a conversation yesterday that left me a bit unsettled. It doesn't really matter what the subject or content of the conversation was just that it was unsettling. I am pretty sure we all have these. you hear or read something that just leaves you unsettled. These are usually things that we can do nothing about and yet they rattle us.

At the root of the issue I turn to a quote by St. Augustine

"My Soul is restless, Lord, until it rests in you"

I was not turning to God at this time. However, I sat down for evening prayer last night and the second psalm was Psalm 131 which speaks of childlike faith in God. I put it here for you to meditate  or muse on.

O Lord, my heart is not proudnor haughty my eyes.I have not gone after things too greatnor marvels beyond me. 

Truly I have set my soulin silence and peace.As a child has rest in its mother’s arms,even so is my soul.

O Israel, hope in the Lordboth now and forever.

Let us all rest in the arms of Jesus today. 

Time To Open The Gifts

1 Peter 4:8-11a - As generous distributors of God’s manifold grace, put your gifts at the service of one another, each in the measure he has received. The one who speaks is to deliver God’s message. The one who serves is to do it with the strength provided by God. Thus, in all of you God is to be glorified through Jesus Christ.

Time to open the gifts!

I have 6 children so you can imagine how many times I have heard this. In the above reading from 1 Peter, this is what I believe God is calling us to do, to open our gifts. As Christians, we have been reborn. We have been given great gifts from God through Jesus Christ. Sadly, most people just take those gifts, say thank you, and put them up on a shelf.

We met with a group of ministry leaders from our church last night. It was a great spirit filled time where we prayed, read scripture and discussed our various ministries. At the heart of it all is the call to put our gifts to use to bring God's message to all the people.

I was touched as I reflected on my service in the church(and outside). I have been given many gifts and I am called to use them for the glory of God. I am a distributor of God's grace. I must speak with words and actions in delivering God's message.

We were having a tense time at work a couple of days ago. I was prompted by the Holy Spirit to stop what we were doing to pray. I knew that the only way I was going to be able to calm the situation was through prayer. It worked! 

Time to open the gifts!

Whirled Peas

World peace would be nice but I would settle for a little peace in my house, myself!

I woke up this morning and quickly moved into panic mode. You see the last few days I have been running late getting to work. Not real late, but being even a few seconds late really gnaws at me. My list of, to-do's, was long. Longer than I could keep track of. Of course writing them down would probably help, but that is for another article.

Praise God that I have a lovely wife who prayed for me to have some peace and relief from my stress. Then I sat down to read the Gospel from today's readings.

John 14:27 - Peace I leave with you; my peace I give to you. Not as the world gives do I give it to you. Do not let your hearts be troubled or afraid.

Jesus promised us His peace. A peace that is so complete that it surpasses all that we have ever known. He gives it without strings or conditions. We don't have to earn it and He will never take it back. So, what happens then?

We give it back!

We give all of our troubles and anxieties to God and he gives us peace. Then we look over at them laying at the foot of his cross and we take them back. Kind of like taking that favorite t-shirt out of the recycle while your wife is not watching. Or when my son sneaks his favorite shirt out of the dirt clothes to wear again for the 4th day in a row. 

We know it is time to give these things away for good. It is time to have our souls washed clean in the blood of the lamb.

Now is the time. Accept the peace offered to you by Jesus.

They Will Pick Up Serpents

On Thursday, I realized that I had been in a bit of a funk. I had not written anything in my blog for about a week and so I proudly said to my wife that I would blog about whatever the readings were that day. 

Then I read the readings. Maybe I should have looked at the readings first, but they were just what I needed to hear and more I have been contemplating on them for a couple days now.

1 Peter 5:6-7 So humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. Cast all your worries upon him because he cares for you.

I think sometimes I am able to cast all my worries on him. But then, I guess I must like my worries because I take them back. The problem I have with worry and anxiety is that they can become self-fulfilling. I am anxious or worried because I may not be good enough. Intellectually, I know this is not the case but still the worry exists. So, then if I sin, I prove that I am not good enough and my worries are justified.

Now that is pretty dumb. And yet we do it. (I am sure I am not the only one).

Why do others seem to have a much higher opinion of what I can do than I do. I mean like my boss seems to think I can work miracles. This makes me feel good and scared at the same time because there is an expectation out there. How can I ever measure up?

Mark 16:17-18 These signs will accompany those who believe: in my name they will drive out demons, they will speak new languages. They will pick up serpents with their hands, and if they drink any deadly thing, it will not harm them. They will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover.

 No pressure here, right? Jesus is telling them they will work miracles, literally. Jesus is calling all of us to work miracles. He has a high opinion of us. He is like a father encouraging his son or daughter to take the training wheels off. 

What are our training wheels? What is keeping us from working the miracles that God has given us the ability to work in His name? How do we get over not feeling worthy?



Cast all your worries upon him because he cares for you.

What a Pity

From "The Practice of the Presence of God":

He often points out our blindness and exclaims that those who content themselves with so little are to be pitied. God, says he, has infinite treasure to bestow, and we take so little through routine devotion which lasts but a moment. Blind as we are, we hinder God, and stop the current of His graces.

I don't even want to think of how often I limit God and what He wants to do in my life. His grace is ever flowing yet we want to put him up on a shelf and then pull him down at prayer or bible study time. Just think, I could be filled with his grace all the time if I would just put myself to the practice of it. 

Brother Lawrence, who wrote most of the content for the book, had a simple practice of always putting himself in the presence of God. I am working toward this.

What keeps you from receiving the grace of God always? Why should we do this? Read the next couple of sentences:

But when He finds a soul penetrated with a lively faith, He pours into it His graces  and favors plentifully. There they flow like a torrent, which, after being forcibly stopped against its ordinary course, when it has found a passage, spreads itself with impetuosity and abundance.

You can find the book here: The Practice of the Presence of God

It Was A Dark And Stormy Night

1 Peter 5:6-7 - So humble yourselves under the mighty hand of God, that he may exalt you in due time. Cast all your worries upon him because he cares for you. 

Thoughts: On September 8th, my worries were truly laid at the feet of God and I was washed clean in the waters of baptism. It was truly a baptism of the Holy Spirit. 

I was a master at worrying. I still have occasional worries as I still live in this world. My worries will not ever be gone until I sit in heaven at the feet of Jesus. 

Through the practice of frequent prayer, constantly laying my worries at the feet of Jesus in humble submission to the will of God I  feel the love that comes from a close, personal relationship with Christ. I now fill the empty spot, where I used to keep my worries, with the word of God.

Once I was able to truly lay all my worries at the foot of the cross and submit myself humbly in prayer to Him, He started using me in awe inspiring ways to share the message to anyone I might have the opportunity to. This call to humble service feeds my soul in so many ways. It may be a bit bold but I feel a real connection to Pope Francis and desire to follow the loving example he is giving us.

Dead, Gone, and Buried

It really hit me this year. Jesus was dead, gone and buried. He was in the tomb. His friends were mourning. 

As Christians, we often seem to overlook that point. I know it has gone mostly unnoticed over the years. We have the benefit of hindsight. We already know how the story is going to end. But I think we need the mourning times in our lives. It is those times of mourning that give us time to slow down and to look at our lives. 

I went to pray a rosary yesterday and I started the Joyful mysteries. but it didn't feel right, I was mourning. So, I start where the Spirit led:

First mystery:
Mary went to the tomb and the angel announces that Jesus is alive and she sees him. 

Second mystery:
Mary bring some of the disciples to visit Jesus in the tomb.

Third mystery:
Jesus appears to the apostles in the upper room.

Fourth mystery:
The Holy Spirit descends and the apostles are baptized in the Holy Spirit.

Fifth mystery:
The disciples are sent out to make disciples of all nations.

It was very cool since we were meeting last night in the Upper Room at our church to pray for the Holy Spirit to come more fully into our lives.

God is good!

Get Over Yourself

Normally, we would consider abandonment a bad thing. We often hear of the young, the old or the sick being abandoned. Even Jesus felt abandoned as he faced crucifixion. Sometimes, we feel abandoned by our friends, co-workers or family members. I have had times where I felt I had no one to turn to, that no one cared about me. 

I have also had many times when we felt that many people went out of there way to help me and be there for me. Just last week when I was feeling kind of low and attacked by the devil, some friends noticed and immediately wanted to pray over me. Usually, it is not that people don't care, it is just that most of them are so busy carrying their own crosses that they are unable to realize what is going on around them. 

My challenge for myself is to be extra sensitive to noticing the crosses of others and to be ready to be their Simon. Chances are my cross will shrink away in nearly nothing when I do this. I have found the prayer below to be a great way to help me to focus on the others and the mission of Jesus Christ.

Prayer of Abandonment

Father,
I abandon myself into your hands; do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do, I thank you:
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only your will be done in me, and in all your creatures.
I wish no more than this, O Lord.

Into your hands I commend my soul;
I offer it to you
with all the love of my heart,
for I love you, Lord,
and so need to give myself,
to surrender myself into your hands,
without reserve,
and with boundless confidence,
for you are my Father.

Charles de Foucald

A Bruised Reed

Isaiah 42:1-4 - Here is my servant whom I uphold, my chosen one with whom I am pleased. Upon whom I have put my Spirit; he shall bring forth justice to the nations, Not crying out, not shouting, not making his voice heard in the street. A bruised reed he shall not break, and a smoldering wick he shall not quench, until he establishes justice on the earth; the coastlands will wait for his teaching.

Thoughts: OK, so I admit it, I am a huge Pope Francis fan. When I read this passage this morning, my first thought was of Francis, our new Pope. His humble actions speak volumes. I saw a photo yesterday of Francis giving a homily. As I looked the photo, he was just radiating joy, it was a smile that drew me in and made we want to be around and to listen. I can imagine  Jesus just the same way. Drawing us all in.

The reading from Isaiah this morning predict the coming of Jesus and describe what his coming would be like. 

When we think of someone coming to bring justice, we often think of punishment for those doing wrong but not so with new savior. The people of Jesus' time thought the messiah would be a might king, a conqueror, a ruler. What we got was a gentle redeemer, a forgiver, a healer. 

We are the bruised reeds of this world, weak and sinful at least cracked if not completely broken. Jesus comes to mend the brokenness in our lives not to destroy or punish. For many Christians even, the light of Christ does not burn brightly but only flickers or smolders. People of this world would say just put it out, it does not give much light anyway. But, Jesus will fan and nurture that flame until it burns brightly once again. No flame is too small for God to revive. 

As we move through Holy Week, let us help mend the bruised reeds all around us and be the instrument to Jesus can use to fan the flame in each other.

Are We Trying To Kill God?

John 8:37 - I know that you are descendants of Abraham. But you are trying to kill me, because my work has no room among you.

Thoughts: As my wife and I read the gospel this morning, this verse stuck out for me. So, I asked my wife, how often do we try to kill God in our everyday life? We both just sat there in meditation. 

The Jews were trying to physically kill Jesus because they found his words hard to accept. They thought he was being unreasonable. He was raising the standard and they didn't like it. Who, of us, likes to be told we are not measuring up? 

While we don't have Jesus physically with us today, we do have the promised Holy Spirit here with us. How often do we try to kill the Spirit of God?

• Do we fail to help someone in need?
• Do we attack others with our words?
• Are we jealous of others?
• Do we fill our minds(and souls) with stuff and push God out?
• Do we have other God's in our life(money, power, work).

I am guilty of most of these so making the list was pretty easy. 

Let's make this final part of Lent a move closer to the sacred heart of Jesus. As part of our Lenten examination of conscience, if you can think of other ways we try to kill God, please comment here so all can benefit.

The Yoke Of Slavery

Galatians 5:1-6 - For freedom Christ set us free; so stand firm and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery.

It is I, Paul, who am telling you that if you have yourselves circumcised, Christ will be of no benefit to you. Once again I declare to every man who has himself circumcised that he is bound to observe the entire law. You are separated from Christ, you who are trying to be satisfied by law; you have fallen from grace. For through the Spirit, by faith, we await the hop of righteousness. For in Christ Jesus, neither circumcision not uncircumcision counts for anything, but only faith working through love. 

Thoughts: Babies often cry when they are in a large open area. After spending 9 months in the comfortable confines of the womb, they feel scared and alone when in an open area. In other words they have too much freedom. 

One way that we used to comfort our young children, and even our older children at times, was to hold them close. When babies can feel warmth and closeness from a parent, they sense the presence of them and feel comforted. We would wrap up our children in blankets and put them in a tiny bassinet at first then move up to a crib and finally to a bed. If we put them into a bed too early they felt insecure and would cry. It is the boundaries and closeness that gives them the freedom to feel comfortable and secure. 

Those boundaries move outward as they grow older but they are still there and are still viable. When we stay in close communion with God, we will feel His love and then we will feel the freedom of knowing that we walk with God. 

Paul was writing to the Galatians because they were being led away from God when they were told they had to obey the mosaic law. They were allowing the customs become more important than the message of Jesus. 

How often do we do the same? 

We let the things of this world become more important than our faith. It can be television or drinking. It can even be something that seems good; a church committee or organization, daily devotions like mass or the rosary. Sometimes we get so wrapped up in the act of doing these things and not resting in the love of Christ which should drive all of our desires. 

So, let’s walk within the boundaries of God’s love and let that love be the driving force behind our actions as faithful disciples of Christ.

God Has A Plan For Me

From Morning Prayer(Liturgy of the Hours) - Eternal Father, you give us life despite our guilt and even add days and years to our lives in order to bring us wisdom. Make us love and obey you, so that the works of our hands may always display what your hands have done, until the day we gaze upon the beauty of your face.

Thoughts: Reading this prayer this morning caused me to think back on my life and all of it's tumultuous events. I recall a young man, 17 years old, who had a lot of knowledge and some pretty good common sense but greatly lacked in wisdom. I would imagine that many of us can relate to that. Kind of like the prodigal son from this Sunday's readings. I imagine he thought himself pretty smart also. 

A life changing moment! It was April 25, 1982, My Dad, brother and myself had gone out for a Sunday drive. We did not know it but our lives would be changed that day. During this scenic drive through the central Texas countryside, I was attempting to make a left hand turn off the highway to go down to the lake. I did not see the 2 semis coming up behind me, one of them attempting to pass the other. The driver of the truck that was in the wrong lane could not stop in time when I started making my turn and he totally t-boned my truck. 

I would have been dead if I had been wearing my seat belt as the impact had completely crushed the drivers compartment of the truck. I did, however, suffer a brain stem contusion leaving me unconscious for 11 days. After about a month in the hospital, I was released to continue my recovery at home. Based on the life I was living at that time, I certainly did not deserve to live and should by all rights have been dead but God had a plan for me. He had chosen to add years to my life. I am sure he added years to my life because he knew it would take years to actually add wisdom to my stubborn nature. 

If we think back upon our lives, most of us will realize some point in our lives when God was watching out for us. We will see the hand of the Holy and Mighty One in a lucky break or a miraculous event. God, through the healing power of Jesus Christ, has set us all aside to know and love and serve him. I know now that my being saved was not an accident. 

Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans that I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for calamity to give you a future and a hope.

Have a great day and know that the Lord truly has great plans for you. Pray that you may see clearly what those plans are and follow him unreservedly and without fear.

No Payment Necessary

Luke 14:12-14 - On a Sabbath Jesus went to dine at the home of one of the leading Pharisees. He said to the host who invited him, “When you hold a lunch or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or sisters or you relatives or your wealthy neighbors, in case they may invite you back and you have repayment. Rather, when you hold a banquet, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind; blessed indeed will you be because of their inability to repay you. For you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.”

Thoughts: People have not really changed much in the last 2,000 years. We often tend to be social climbers. I have often caught myself looking to invite someone over and it is most often that my mind turns to those I see as successful or admirable. How often do we play the part of the Pharisee? Probably, far too often. 

Jesus has been nudging me for years on this one, though. I am convicted of the fact that we need to reach out to those who may seem ‘below’ us socially or economically. They are no less important because we are all created in the image of God, but we living in this world inadvertently put people into groups or classes. We need to reach out to those who are hurting. Someone who is not ill does not need a doctor. Jesus consistently reached out to those who were shunned and looked down upon by the world. He had a special affection those in this world who are oppressed.

Suddenly, I see pain, suffering, and despair in many people I come in contact with. These are the people that I am to reach out to. These are people that we are to reach out to. I try to be in tune with the Holy Spirit now when I meet people. We are meant to be social creatures. We need to be active and interactive with those around us. 

On Monday night we were talking about agape love. Love that does not seek repayment. The kind of love we can only have as a gift from God. It is only through Him that we can put aside our selfish selves and truly love as Christ loved. How can we do this though? It is so foreign to us. Try practicing the presence of God. Let Jesus be a part of every minute of your life. 

This is my challenge this lent. To be generous as our Lord is generous.

Transfiguration vs Transubstantian

Yesterday we listened to the Gospel about the transfiguration.  Peter, James and John wanted to stay there.  Jesus said that we couldn't that they had to go back, that there was more and better things coming.  The Gospel states that Jesus' appearance changed, that he became dazzlingly white.  However, his essence did not change, he was still the same Jesus.

This made me think.  How often do we transfigure ourselves?  We put on a baseball cap and a jersey and suddenly we are a baseball fan.  We put on a suit and carry a bible and we are a christian. We do many, many things to change our appearance, to become different things. None of these things change our true essence just as in the transfiguration of Jesus.

During this Lenten season, I would suggest that we look for something a little more. Let's ask Jesus to be transformed.  Ask him to change our essence to be more like Christ.  How do we do this?  Here are a couple of suggestions. Attend mass and experience Jesus in the transubstantiation of the bread. His body given up for us.  Pray for the release of the Holy Spirit in our heart to transform and conform us more into the likeness of Christ. I will leave you with this prayer by Charles de Foucald.

Father,
I abandon myself into you hands; do with me what you will.
Whatever you may do, I thank you:
I am ready for all, I accept all.
Let only you will be done in me, and in all your creatures.
I wish no more than this, O Lord.

Into you hand I commend my soul;
I offer it to you
with all the love of my heart,
for I love you Lord,
and so need to give  myself,
to surrender myself into your hands,
without reserve,
and with boundless confidence,
for you are my Father.

Amen.

An Oath to Abraham

Luke 1:73-75 - This was the oath he swore to our father Abraham: to set us free from the hands of our enemies, free to worship him without fear; holy and righteous in his sight all the days of our life.

Thoughts:  In our society there are many oaths that are taken by people at different times. When a politician takes office they swear an oath to serve the people, Boy scouts take a similar oath. Someone testifying in court takes an oath to tell the truth. In each case we are making a promise to our peers and authorities to undertake a duty to the best of our ability.

In the Gospel reading above God is making an oath to Abraham and the Jewish people. He is promising to set them free from their enemies where they will be free to worship him without fear. In their time punishment and death were a very real possibility if they worshiped and followed God. We know from history that God did indeed free them.

This promise of freedom through God is just as relevant for us today as it has ever been. As we go through this Lenten season I have been reflecting on just who are our enemies?  Most of us do not have to fear physical death but we have very real enemies. I look at all of the addictions that are rampant in our society today. Drugs, alcohol, pornography, money, and consumerism just to name a few. I have had issues with most of these but just as God came to set Abraham's people free, he comes to set me free also. 

I have been set free! And now, I worship him without fear and by the mercy of God I hope to stay holy and righteous in his sight all the days of my life. May we have the courage to let go of those enemies already conquered for us this Lent.

Amen!

Grow Where You're Planted

Mark 6:4 - Jesus said to them, "A prophet is not without honor except in his native place and among his own kin and in his own house."

Thoughts: First, let me start with a disclaimer, I do not think I am Jesus and I am not declaring myself a prophet. But I do believe that we are all called to be disciples and to evangelize. As I mention in my bio, I am currently applying to the diaconate. One of the stipulations of becoming a deacon is that I will serve where the Bishop assigns me. This is generally not your home parish.

You see, I am a convert to Catholicism. I joined the church at Easter in 1989. I have only known one parish my whole christian life. So, the thought of leaving my church family made me pause to think. Then I read the words in the Gospel of Mark and it made me truly contemplate what it means to be a disciple. I pray that I will develop into the disciple that God wants me to be. Hopefully, that will be as a deacon of the church. I also realize that He must plant me where I will bear much fruit even if that means leaving the only parish I have ever known.

Will there be some sadness if I have to leave my parish family? Of course. But on the flip side I will have the opportunity to meet people and minister to their needs where ever I am planted. God is amazing and can bring miracles wherever He wants to. 

Thank you Jesus for the opportunity to make disciples of all nations!

Who do you say that I am?

Matthew 16:15-16 - He said to them, "But who do you say that I am?" Simon Peter said in reply, "You are the messiah, the Son of the living God."

Thoughts: Who do I say that Jesus is? This was a question that was posed to me a couple weeks ago and I have been thinking about it since. As I reflect on this question, many words come to mind. 

Father, brother, and guide identify the different roles I see Jesus playing in my life. He is the Father that gives sagely wisdom. He is the Brother and friend I can turn to for help. 

Healer, redeemer, and prophet come to mind when I think about what Jesus has done in my life. 

He is the Creator of all things. This is ever visible when looking in the eyes of my children. 

He is Light, shining for me in my greatest darkness.

Jesus is the standard. He is the perfect example of how things should be, of how we should be. I also think of God like a mother. Always there to take care of us and always there to comfort us and pick us up. No matter how often we fall and disappoint Him, he is always ready to forgive me and give me a chance to do better.

Jesus is eternal and everywhere. I find him in the stillness of the night and the business of my day. 

Jesus is life.

My Body, Broken and Given Up For You

Years ago I was on staff at a Christ Renews His Parish(CHRP) retreat. It was a great time as this was an outreach retreat where we were helping start the retreat at another parish. One of the most important aspects of the retreat is that everything is done in prayer and with prayer support. 

I was honored to be asked by a good friend to be his special prayer support. He was to give a talk to the attendees and I would be in the chapel, on my knees, in front of the blessed sacrament praying for him while he was talking. This was to be a very difficult talk for my friend and I knew it. 

You see, about a year earlier, he and his wife were expecting a child. They had learned that the child, although still in the womb, had a heart defect and the child would only live for a few hours after birth. Of course, given the circumstances, the well meaning doctors suggested aborting the pregnancy. My friend and his wife informed the doctors that no they could not abort this child, created by God. The remaining time of the pregnancy and the birth and inevitable death of the child came to pass. 

The time comes for his talk and I proceed to the chapel to start praying for my friend. I enter the chapel, kneel in front of the blessed sacrament in the monstrance, and start praying. As I gazed at the monstrance, I noticed that the host inside was broken. I was outraged. They couldn't at least get an unbroken host for the monstrance. But, God is good and perfect.

I started thinking that a broken host was OK. I mean, Jesus was broken on the cross, wasn't he? Does the fact that Jesus was broken on the cross make him any less God, any less holy? The answer is no. 

And if a broken Jesus, was still holy and perfect, would he love that child any less just because he was broken. Just because of a little heart defect. His life was short but carried a great impact on all who know the story. Jesus especially loved the broken and the sick. We are all broken in some way and Jesus loves us even in our broken state. For that we must always praise God.

I shared this account with my friend afterward and our lives will never be the same. I also know that little Anthony is in heaven now, free from the earthly body that only served him for a few hours after his birth. He looks down on us now in his new state praising God and watching out for his family.

We called to embrace both the broken and resurrected Jesus, going through the broken to get to the resurrected.

Matthew 26:26 - While they were eating, Jesus took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to his disciples, saying, "Take and eat; this is my body."